I’ve written before about my relatively desperate attempts to meditate. I phrase it that way because it seems like, no matter what happens, my efforts fade away. Then I’m reminded of how important meditation can be for depression at a later date. I start again, I start again, and the cycle continues.
The good news – well, at least for me – is that I am in a cycle now where I am actually meditating. While I haven’t noticed a change in thinking yet, I will say that I always feel better and more peaceful in the immediate aftermath of a meditation session. And, that sense of peace is what I want to discuss in this entry, because I had a genuinely interesting realization while meditating the other day.
The meditation I practice – which, from what I’ve read, is the best kind for a depressed or anxious person to engage in – is mindfulness meditation. It’s a little complicated to explain – mainly because I don’t understand it and I kinda suck at – but the basics is focusing on nothing – and, in so doing, improving your focus.
Like I said, I’m terrible at it. My mind moves at a million miles an hour and I can’t shut it off. That’s one of the many reasons I am meditating: To try to relax and improve my focus.
So, the other day, I’m meditating. I have been sticking with five minute sessions – YouTube videos – and doing so because if I do longer I fall asleep. Anyway, I’m almost done. That realization is met with a degree of happiness and sadness. Happiness because I can get back to work. Sadness because I am at peace. And then I realize something: I’m at peace. Meditating is nice, and when I can actually concentrate enough to do it right, it fills me with peace.
That, then, triggers a question: What does peace feel like to me? There’s an easy answer, too: A fullness. A fullness in my chest which crowds out any negative feelings.
So, here’s my suggestion: Find what peace feels like to you. Because if you do, you can recognize the feeling when you actually experience it. And maybe, from there, learn how to keep it with you, even if it’s only just an extra moment or two.
Anyway, that’s something to think about: What does peace feel like to you? Let us know in the comments below!
Mike Schlossberg - Author 
Mike, I have had the same experience with meditation, tried for years with little or no success. Have now worked my way up from 2 to 6 minutes 2x day.You mentioned youtube videos–I have an app on my phone called Insight Timer that was recommended by a psychologist and long-time meditator (who freely admits that she sucks at it too). It’s cool because it has guided meditations but you can also create ambient background noise (I’m partial to the Buddhist monks chanting) with no guide. It also tracks how many consecutive days you’ve meditated which I find motivating. And of course there’s a timer.
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