For a lot of reasons, I slept like hell last night. For me, that’s dangerous. To be clear, all of us need a good amount of sleep in order to function the next day – I need at least five hours, I’d say, to be able to fire on all cylinders.
However, and this goes without saying, there is a huge connection between mental health and sleep. A lack of sleep can hurt your mental health, and mental health challenges can hurt your ability to get sleep. I know that both of these items are true for me, and I also know that on nights where I barely sleep (like three hours or less), I can barely function. As I said to my wife today, it feels like my head is filled with landmines and ballerinas that are blowing up those landmines. I absolutely cannot think straight. Of course, that may make this blog entry kind of interesting, so if I write out CHEEEEEEESE or something with no context, just bear with me.
Anyway. If you are like me, this can be a real challenge. A lack of sleep fires every one of my depression and anxiety genes, and I feel like I lack the coping and logic skills to get those emotions back in the bottle. My head feels like it’s filled with fog and sand.
How do I deal with this? I’m not quite sure yet, to be honest. But, broadly speaking, here are some thoughts.
Treat it as a sick day
Look, when you don’t sleep, you feel like crap, right? Take it for what it is: It’s a sick day. I’m not saying curl up in bed and take the day off from work – that may not be an option – but what I am saying is you should go easy on yourself. It’s not as if you somehow asked for mental health problems or to sleep like crap. Give yourself a break, and don’t hold yourself to the same standards that you may do on an otherwise normal day.
Ask yourself what you can do
One of the more impactful moments of my life came about a year after my son was born and when my wife was pregnant with our daughter. I was much, much heavier – 31 pounds or so, depending on the day. And I was upset. I’d really let myself go. And I was complaining about it to my wife, but the complaints weren’t action-oriented. They were just me bitching. And she said the line to me:
“So, what are you going to do about it?”
I don’t know about you, but on days where I’m struggling for one reason or another, I always feel better when I ask myself that question. Look, everyone has bad days. But if they become a pattern, you have to ask yourself that question. What are you going to do about it? And that’s a key question, because yeah, things may suck at the moment, but if you can say to yourself, “Yes, I can barely think straight and am probably less coordinated now than I am when I’ve had a few drinks, but what can I do to make sure I take care of myself?”
According to sleep.org, a nap the next day can potentially be helpful, as it can help ease the impact of having trouble sleeping. However, timing is key: Early to mid-afternoon is best, as this decreases the chances of your naping hurting your ability to sleep later that night.
Ultimately, these are just some broad thoughts, and I’d be really curious to hear yours…particularly considering I’m about to go face first into my keyboard. Any advice would be appreciated!
One thought on “Landmines and Ballerinas: How to cope with a lack of sleep when you’ve got mental health issues”
It felt good to be validated! I have the same issue. Also thanks for the suggestions.